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Child Behavior (Expert Forum)
Our 15 yr. old son
Answered by
Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D. - Child and Adolescent Psychotherapy, Family Therapy, Crisis Intervention
Harvard Vanguard Medical Associates
This forum is for questions and support regarding child behavior issues such: Child Discipline (behavior management), Normal Child Development, Parent-Child Communications, Social Development
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Our 15 yr. old son
by CLAUDETTE, Oct 25, 1999 12:00AM
To begin with our son is 15, His oldest brother is 22 and married, his sister is 18, and his younger brother is 13. Recently our son was involved (admittingly so) involved in some felony burglaries throughout 3 different parishes. We thought he was 1/2 mile down the road from our home on at least 5 different nights, camping out with some other young boys, most who we knew. To make a long story short around midnight or so they would all pile into a friend's truck, (17 yr. old) and head out to steal. The driver has been in trouble before and had been doing this for at least 6 months before meeting up with the kids in this area. I am not blaming the other children, my son made a choice each time he went. We were devastated to learn this but all the detectives keep telling us is that he is a good kid but got mixed up with the wrong crowd. He is a good kid but suffers with ADHD in school, he is in the 10th grade. He has an anger problem. We insisted that he receive counseling since this incident 2 weeks ago, and will attend sessions every week with a juvenile counselor in our area. All this is good, but he has a bad attitude, he wants to "beat up" the world. He says alot that he doesn't care about some things but I know it is not true. He is irresponsible when using his father's tools and such, is having a hard time being "punished" from the phone and social activities for the time being, but he has to realize that he repeatedly invaded other people's privacy and stole things they worked for and he must earn our trust of him back. The kids were using marijuana and drinking on many of these outings. What else can we do? He will have to appear before a judge in about 6 months to find out what type of curfew and probation he will receive. He says he is sorry for the crimes, but I wonder is it just he is sorry for getting caught. This is the first time we have had trouble with him involving the law. He always says "I don't want to hurt my little brother, but he makes me so mad." I am praying that he doesn't have some type of personality disorder,or anti-social behavior. At one time everyone got along well with him, but it seems lately he makes all the young girls that like him mad at him. Some days he makes me laugh other days he makes me cry, there is no inbetween with him. He is disruptive in class even though is is on Adderall for school days. He has this behavior whether it is summertime with no medicine or school with it.. Please help. Thank you. Claudette ***@****
Doctor's Answer
by Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D., Oct 26, 1999 12:00AM
, Oct 26, 1999 12:00AM
Dear Claudette,
Your son is now in therapy - hopefully this will lead to (a) an understanding of why this behavior is occurring, and (b) a plan for some action (in addition to the therapy itself). Be sure to confer with the therapist and collaborate closely around your son's treatment.
If possible, seek the help of the Court to establish some groundrules now, rather than wait six months. He would likely profit from a curfew (court-ordered) and periodic reports from the home and school to the probation office at the Court. Your son's therapist may be able to advise you about this.
Also, speak with the prescribing psychiatrist about addressing your son's anger. There are a number of antidepressant medications (e.g., Zoloft, Paxil) and other medications (e.g., anti-hypertensives, mood stabilizers) that might benefit him.
Your son is now in therapy - hopefully this will lead to (a) an understanding of why this behavior is occurring, and (b) a plan for some action (in addition to the therapy itself). Be sure to confer with the therapist and collaborate closely around your son's treatment.
If possible, seek the help of the Court to establish some groundrules now, rather than wait six months. He would likely profit from a curfew (court-ordered) and periodic reports from the home and school to the probation office at the Court. Your son's therapist may be able to advise you about this.
Also, speak with the prescribing psychiatrist about addressing your son's anger. There are a number of antidepressant medications (e.g., Zoloft, Paxil) and other medications (e.g., anti-hypertensives, mood stabilizers) that might benefit him.
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